


We don't need a safe word

by Nana_yv



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Breathplay, Confrontations, Drama, Engagement, Erotica, Fluff and Smut, Kissing, Love, M/M, Marriage Proposal, One Shot, Oral Sex, Relationship Problems, Rimming, Romance, Smut, Switching, Top/Bottom Meian Shuugo, Top/Bottom Miya Osamu, versatile couple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 22:49:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29848707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nana_yv/pseuds/Nana_yv
Summary: Shugo and Osamu just moved in together and things couldn’t be more perfect, if it wasn’t for the strange feeling, weighing heavy on Osamu’s heart, that there was something that Shugo just couldn’t let him know about. Purposely keeping Osamu at a distance, and assuring him that nothing was wrong whenever he tried to bring Shugo to talk to him.This story is about the relationship between Osamu and Shugo who have to learn that loving someone also includes, accepting one another for who they are and figuring out a way in between to make things work, even if you have to face things you are afraid of or if it could mean that you would risk losing the person you love.
Relationships: Meian Shuugo & Miya Osamu, Meian Shuugo/Miya Osamu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 19





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> today I can finally share with you the story I have been working on for the past couple of days, doing pretty much nothing else than writing, sleeping 4 hours, eating and more writing and then repeating everything from scratch. By now I am so tired I might just pass out for the next couple of days.  
> But before I pass out and let you move on to read the actual story and not my half-asleep written chapter note, I want to inform you about eventual triggering content as well as the request to please read the following note carefully.
> 
> PLEASE READ/  
> TRIGGER WARNING:
> 
> 1)  
> This story is only meant for an adult audience, whatever age that is considered in your country, therefore even if you are a curious 16-year-old (younger or older than that but still not an adult) please refrain from reading this story!
> 
> 2)  
> This story is a work of fiction, OBVIOUSLY! and although I am always paying attention on keeping things realistic, my story does not work as an example on how things are done or supposed to be done. Please don’t assume that if something works well in this story it might work as well in real life! To make things work in real life, I ask you to educate and inform yourself beforehand and not just go and try things you read in a fanfiction story. Fiction and real life are two separate things.
> 
> 3)  
> This story contains explicit description of erotic asphyxiation better known as breath control play or breath play in short.  
> If this is something you are unable to read or deal with then this is your cue to please close the tab and do not read any further than this. 
> 
> For the others who have no idea of what I am talking about yet or are simply curious since you think this sounds interesting, I would want you to look and read the articles I linked below first and decide then if you are okay with it or not. 
> 
> I had already some knowledge on this type of thing but to assure myself and also offer research material and articles to read for the curious, I looked it up myself and took the content mentioned in the articles into consideration as I wrote this fic.
> 
> These are two of the many articles I read through which sum up and explain it very well and easy.  
> [breath play](https://shopnox.com/blogs/journal/so-you-wanna-be-choked)  
> [risks and additional information about breath play](https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/erotic-asphyxiation)
> 
> To the rest of you who are up for a fun ride and some kinky stuff, I hope you enjoy reading!

* * *

After dating for about a year, Shugo had brought up moving in together.

Osamu had spent most of his time sleeping and living with Shugo for quite a while already, so it wasn’t that far-fetched to consider moving in together. Osamu had slowly started to move things from his flat to Shugo’s and just like that he eventually moved in with him completely.

But just like any move, it did take them some time to sort things out as Shugo’s job demanded him to travel frequently rather than occasionally, while Osamu was hardly ever leaving the city unless his business allowed him to, or he had to. Not to mention the fact that it was one hell of an announcement, when they finally decided to let everyone know they were dating after being secret about it for months due to various reasons.

Back then, the media was running wild hearing the news about that Shugo Meian, the Black Jackal Captain and long-term single, finally announced to be dating someone and Miya Osamu, his teammate’s younger twin brother on top of that. There was no way that this would be brushed off in a few hours. And it really wasn’t.

It became huge. The OsaMei-hashtag, a combination of their most commonly used names, started trending on twitter worldwide and everyone suddenly claimed they knew this was gonna happen since they already had an inkling about it for quite a while. Although, Shugo and Osamu were more than careful to not let anyone notice.

Even Atsumu had no idea about them until Osamu told him, getting slightly jealous that his own announcement with his boyfriend didn’t catch the media as Osamu and Shugo’s did. But that was most probably because Atsumu was never really secret about who he was dating ever since he joined the Black Jackal.

Only after days, the news finally started to calm and once Shugo and Osamu were no longer in the centre of attention, they could relax and concentrate on their time they spend together, adjusting some of the new furniture Osamu had ordered under the excuse that Shugo’s flat looked as empty as a museum and enjoying to arranging things fitted for two people.

More than once, Osamu had made fun of Shugo for keeping his flat on a rather puristic and plain concept and it definitely needed some changes, and he was far too willing to take care of these changes.

Shugo was never the type to be fond of things he didn’t find necessary and therefore kept his flat minimalistic and modern but ever since he started dating Osamu, he noticed these small changes as Osamu began to buy pillows for the couch, frames and pictures for the walls and other minor items that were attached to memories of the two of them. Watching the rooms turn from a blank canvas into a colourful painting filled with Osamu’s passion for details and aesthetic, Shugo couldn’t hold back to smile whenever he walked through the apartment, noticing another item Osamu had added to it.

For Shugo it had been years since the last time he lived together with someone and opened up about his private life like that and now that Osamu was by his side, he couldn’t imagine what was life like without him and seeing his things alongside Osamu’s in their home made everything so real.

Osamu changed him and it was a change Shugo had welcomed with open arms. However, Shugo knew that Osamu was aware that there was still a barrier between them, which he had set, and which kept Osamu at a distance.

It was nothing like physically not letting him close, they had sex, made out and showed affection for each other like any other couple, but in the past year of their relationship, Shugo remained to keep some sort of wall which Osamu was still unable to cross or to get him to open up about.

He had tried to, more than he could count, but whenever Osamu brought it up, wanting to talk about it, Shugo just brushed it off and told him not to worry as it’s not important.

But how could something that forced an invisible line between them, and their relationship be not important?

Osamu wasn’t an expert in dating. He had flings and dated a few people ever since high, though none of that was as serious as the relationship he had with Shugo. Shugo was the first person and the first man he ever wanted and who he fell in love with.

Dating the person you loved couldn’t be compared to casually seeing someone out of curiosity just to experience it and it certainly didn’t offer enough experience to magically become a genius in the said field either to know what he was supposed to do about that issue.

Not to mention that Atsumu, the only person Osamu would actually feel comfortable enough to talk about this issue with, was in no position to give him serious advice on that.

Which left Osamu with either relying on the internet and some blogs that addressed his concern or asking his boyfriend directly.

In the end, after reading all kinds of articles and blogs on the internet, Osamu had to realise that they did help him at some point but wouldn’t be of much use solving the issue between him and Shugo. Which left the only option open that was talking to Shugo directly and getting him to explain. He wanted their relationship to be healthy and ignoring or continuing to brush off something like this couldn’t be considered healthy on a long run from here on out, Osamu knew at least that much, and he didn’t have to be an expert for that.

* * *


	2. Main Story

* * *

It took Osamu another week to get the courage and find a way to talk to Shugo as the timing was never right. Which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing because it gave Osamu enough time to think about the things he actually wanted to say, yet the longer he had postponed it, the worse it made him feel and the awkward things became between him and Shugo.

Realising that this couldn’t continue as it was, Osamu decided that today he would get Shugo to talk to him.

They had just finished dinner and cleaned the dishes together, when Shugo let Osamu know that he would want to watch the news in the living room, giving Osamu the chance to take a shower in the meantime and calm his nerves as he was quite worried, uncertain if the thing he had in mind would work out the way it did in his thoughts, but he would just have to try and see.

Walking to the bathroom which still felt hilariously huge for only two people, Osamu took off his clothes and stepped under the shower.

Turning the water on, he took a quick shower, making sure to clean himself properly just in case before he finished showering and stepped out of it to dry himself off.

Getting dressed in a black shirt and some grey sweatpants, Osamu quickly brushed through his hair with his hands as he blow-dried it very idly before he brushed his teeth at last.

Adjusting the soft black wisps with his fingers and some haircare oil to make it sit in place, Osamu took one last glance into the mirror to assure himself that he looked, stepping out of the bathroom afterwards.

Shutting the door behind him Osamu walked to their living room to join Shugo, sitting on the couch, legs crossed, arms resting on either side of the backrest, he was watching TV when his eyes turned to Osamu.

Meeting his eyes, Shugo reached for the remote to switch off the TV, not taking his eyes off of Osamu as he stood in the room.

Looking a little confused, he chuckled uneasily.

“Uhm... I thought you just took a shower, but instead you look as if you are planning to go out? Did I maybe miss something?” Shugo frowned when Osamu shook his head walking close enough until he stood in front of him.

Tilting his head, Shugo swallowed, his face at the perfect position to be levelled at the height of Osamu’s groin. Brushing through Shugo’s hair, Osamu shook his head again.

“No, you didn’t, I just want your attention, do you think I can have that?”

Osamu smiled when Shugo licked his lips, lifting his chin to look up into Osamu’s eyes.

“Always.” He gulped, making his boyfriend chuckle.

Slowly opening his lips, Osamu raised his hand to caress Shugo’s chin, smiling softly.

“I thought tonight...” He began, “...we can talk, about why I feel like that you are hiding something from me.”

Osamu was barely able to finish his sentence when he could already see Shugo shaking his head, turning away.

Osamu had expected that reaction and any other day he would have accepted it but not today, today they would talk.

His eyes darkening he grabbed Shugo’s face with both hands, making him turn to him. Raising his voice, Osamu sighed irritated.

“Why not!? We can talk about anything but whenever I bring this up you always avoid me and play it down. I tried so many times, but every time you keep telling me the same. What is it that you can’t tell me. It can’t be something so bad that you really think I wouldn’t be able to stand knowing it, is it? Or is it that you regret us living together, is that it? Are you trying to think of a way to break up with me and avoid talking to me for that reason? Is that it?”

Shugo’s eyes widened in shock listening to Osamu’s words as they pained him, hearing that those are the things that Osamu thought of. Gritting his teeth, he clutched his palms on Osamu’s hands to hold on to them.

“No. Osamu that’s not it. I don’t want to break up with you and I am happy that you are finally living together with me. But...Please understand that there are things that I just can’t speak to you about because I don’t want you to feel pressured by it.”

“Pressured!?” Osamu looked at him confused. “Shugo, if you think I would feel pressured just because you are relying on me about something that concerns you, then I think we have more than one problem. I am your boyfriend, I may not be able to help you with every single thing that causes you worries or concern, but at least I would be able to try and help you or carry the worries together with you, if you tell me about them! That is why people are in a relationship. To talk to each other and to be there when we need help and get comforted. But nothing of this will work if you refuse to talk to me and keep hiding things from me.”

Shugo’s expression turned blank and his hands slumped down as he tried to keep his voice as calm as he could hearing Osamu’s words.

“We...shouldn’t continue this now. Not when we are already fighting about it. This isn’t right.”

Osamu bit his, hands dropping down to his sides as he watched Shugo turn away his face, avoiding his eyes.

Staying like this, none of them said another word until Shugo sighed concerned.

“You...you...shouldn’t stay like this. Your hair is still wet, you’ll end up catching a cold.”

Letting out a bitter laughter, Osamu shook his head in disbelieve looking at Shugo’s expression.

“Refusing to talk to me about what makes us fight, but at the same time showing concern about me, aren’t you a little too much?”

Getting Shugo to look at him, Osamu held his breath when he saw his face twisted with pain. Gritting his teeth, Osamu reached out to grab his shoulders, pushing him back against the backrest of their couch to straddle his lap, getting on top of him.

Lowering his weight down onto Shugo, he moved his hands to caress Shugo’s face.

“Shu, please.” Osamu whispered, leaning his forehead against him.

Shugo could feel his heart clenching in his chest as he hesitated to put his hands on Osamu’s hips.

“Samu, what if what I am going to tell you makes you want to leave me, because it puts you off? Would you still be okay with that?” Shugo took a deep breath, waiting for Osamu’s reply.

Chuckling amused with a slight bitter tone, Osamu leaned back wanting to look Shugo properly into his eyes. 

“Well even if that is the case, as long as you won’t tell me, we won’t be able to know.”

Now it was Shugo who had to laugh because Osamu was obviously right as he took another deep breath, slumping against Osamu’s chest.

“Why did you even have to ask?” He sighed, feeling Osamu’s heart beat faster as his hands brushed through Shugo’s hair.

“Because I love you and I want to know what’s on your mind.”

Shugo frowned hearing his response before he tightened the grip around Osamu’s hips, pulling him closer. Letting out a faded moan, Osamu dug his hands into Shugo’s hair, licking his lips as he felt Shugo’s hot breath against his chest.

“I don't want to hurt you.”

Osamu sighed, shaking his head.

“You won't...I will be fine...Whatever you are going to tell me it won’t put me off.”

“You sound pretty sure of yourself, Miya.” Shugo exhaled.

“I am.” Osamu snickered proud, cupping Shugo’s face to look into his eyes when he saw his lips trembling.

“Osamu, I don't want you to regret this. I don't want you to hate me.”

Up until now, Osamu had been certain that things would eventually turn out fine, but Shugo’s words just now, suddenly made him wonder about that.

Why could he even think this?

Osamu couldn’t understand this, but if Shugo was willing to talk now, he had to make sure he got to understand him as much as he could.

Reaching out to lift up Shugo’s chin, Osamu smiled at him, trying to cast away the darkness growing within Shugo’s eyes as the anxiety from what he was about to reveal to him held on to the invisible wall, keeping Osamu out. 

“I would never hate you. I love you. Everything you do, everything you did and everything I get to experience with you, all if it made me fall in love with you, but no matter how much I try, you still won’t let me in completely. I know I am persistent and old fashioned and maybe other couples are fine with keeping secretes, but I am not. I am not used to not knowing what is going on with the person I am in love with. I am not used to watch from the side lines while I can see there is something bothering you. Shugo, is it that you just can’t trust me?” Osamu sighed.

And just like that Shugo understood why Osamu was so desperate knowing what was bothering. All his life he had been together with his twin, with Atsumu, knowing when something was wrong with him, sensing if he was in pain and silently understanding what he needed. Osamu had gotten so used to that type of connection that now that he was with Shugo, he felt at a loss, being unable to understand what was going on with him.

Frowning while rushing his hands up to Osamu, Shugo touched his cheek, moving his thumbs over his skin in a soothing motion while managing a comforting smile.

“Osamu, I trust you.”

“Then why?!” Osamu sounded frustrated, struggling to hold in his anger the more Shugo made him wait.

Lowering his eyes, Shugo grit his teeth, pressing his eyes together, before he exhaled. With all his decisions and all his attempts to escape this moment, thinking that way he avoided hurting the man he loved, he only made Osamu feel more miserable.

The words he was about to say, felt heavy on his tongue but when he saw the man, he loved look so desperate and concerned, Shugo moved his lips.

“Samu, I...” Shugo began but was cut off when Osamu frowned.

“Shugo, I need you talk to me right now! We have to talk about it and either solve it, if it is something that can be solved, or we have to discuss it at least and figure out a way to make it work.” Osamu yelled.

“And if it is neither of it and you actually really want us to break up then tell me right now because the more you keep things from me the worse our relationship will become and I’m not trying to make this work if we are already broken and unable to speak honestly with each other so please! Shugo just tell me!”

Shugo didn't say anything instead he shut his eyes and swallowed before opening them again. Trying to force a soothing smile on his lips, he reached up to cup Osamu’s face. Gold-greyish eyes meeting his dark chocolaty ones.

Osamu could see them darken as they moved to his lips, to his chin until they came to a pause at his throat. Occupied by his boyfriend’s gaze, Osamu didn't even notice that Shugo’s hands slid down along with them until he felt his thumb stroke up and down Osamu’s Adam’s apple. Tilting his head, a soft frown growing between his eyes, he looked at Osamu.

“Osamu...Tell me, how this feels for you?”

Shugo tightened the grip on Osamu’s throat slowly and carefully, pressing his hands to each side of his neck. Trying how far he could go, he gradually increased his grip, waiting for his reaction to stop him, he pressed his hands further into Osamu’s skin.

Shugo watched him, the feeling of his pulse throbbing against the palm of his hand, holding on to his slender neck, making his mouth moist with excitement as a shiver ran down his spine, yet guilty at how much this already aroused him, he let his hands remain like that.

Swallowing but feeling how Shugo’s grip prevented him from that, Osamu gasped for air, eyes fluttering shut, he tried to adjust to the sensation, clenching onto Shugo’s shirt he pressed his legs against Shugo’s thighs.

“G...good...argh...” Osamu panted.

Sighing, Shugo clicked his tongue.

He expected everything from Osamu, from being pushed away and called disgusting to the sight of plain fear in his eyes and not wanting him to come near him ever again.

But the idea of Osamu actually telling him it felt good, was not even on his list as he pushed his crotch up against Osamu straddling his lap.

Osamu let out another moan in response, pulling on Shugo’s shirt as he decided to try and tighten his grip a little further, not once taking his eyes away from Osamu to make sure to stop if it became too intense, looking at his lover’s response.

Whining out, Osamu grabbed Shugo’s wrists, a gurgling sound escaping his throat, he clenched around them, body tensing to the touch as a tear ran down the corner of his eyes before Shugo let go, panting with fear and pleasure all at once. Catching the sight of Osamu’s flushed face, he dropped his head against his shoulder, hesitant to hug him at first before embracing him to listen to the sound of his ragged breath.

He held back to speak, afraid that it would scare Osamu away from him only to fathom that saying nothing, would change anything since for a reason Shugo couldn’t understand yet, Osamu was still here and didn’t run away. It was a gamble, but Shugo was willing to risk it all in order to hold on to the possibility that even after this their relationship had a still a chance to work out.

Cleaning his throat, Shugo moved his lips ready to speak.

“Did that still feel good?”

Holding him close, Shugo slid his hands down Osamu’s chest, pressing his body against hips down, making Osamu feel his erection bulging inside his pants.

Shugo had no comparison to what he was feeling right now. Never before had he been this nervous, not on the court or at any other memory that he could think of at the moment.

He wanted to hear what Osamu was thinking, but instead he was punished with silence and he regrated to have betted on his hope. For a moment Shugo thought silence might have been even a worse response to his question than anything else.

And although Shugo felt some sort of relieve that he could finally talk about it, the regret of what might happen now that Osamu knew, was really taking it out on him, already trying to befriend the fact that this could mean the end of their relationship.

Presuming that there is no way Osamu could ever understand this, Shugo shut his eyes before he pulled away, letting go of his body. Feeling Osamu’s weight sink further down into his lap, he increased the distance between them to give Osamu the choice to leave when he felt Osamu’s grip tighten on his shirt, stopping him to move further away.

Twitching with hope from that little gesture, Shugo grit his teeth. His voice bland but his words genuinely honest, he lifted his face, yet stopping at the level of Osamu’s lips to not let his eyes wander any further than there.

“If you want to leave...Y...You can leave...I won't touch you and I won’t stop you...” He held his breath.

“...you wanted to know the reason. This is it. This is why I drew that line between us. Something like this arouses me. Seeing your face flush, feeling your pulse throb against my palms, the way your body tenses...It excites me. More...” Shugo hesitated, “...more than the way we used to do it until now... I am fine with normal sex and I get pleasure from it and sleeping with you always made me feel good, so I hope you believe me when I say that I never loved anyone more than you, but this is what I desire as well. It’s what gives me a particular kind of pleasure...I don’t need it, but I want it...I know this makes me a monster but-“

Shugo couldn’t continue when he felt Osamu’s hand covering his mouth. Startled by the gentle touch, he met Osamu’s expression, seeing him smile at him, while his cheeks were still tainted in a light pink colour.

Shugo couldn’t understand why Osamu would be smiling now but what had him even more puzzled was hearing his soft happy chuckle.

“Finally you are looking at me again.”

His throat ached and it was a little difficult to speak as the sensation of having something stuck inside it didn’t help at that, but it was not as bad as he imagined and by the look of Shugo’ expression, he didn’t want to stay quiet.

“So because of this?... You held back all this time because of this? This is the reason why you drew that line while making me think of all sorts of things?”

Osamu could feel Shugo’s breath slowing underneath his hand, taking it back to enclose the frame of his face with the warmth of his palms, fingertips brushing over the sharp lines of his jaw.

Staring at him, Shugo couldn’t believe the words he heard. They were so far away from everything he expected, it felt almost as if he was just having a dream. Pressing his lips shut he shook his head, dropping his gaze down between their bodies while putting his hand on top of Osamu’s.

“Osamu, I...”

Shugo didn’t know what he was supposed to say or do.

“Let me go first.” Osamu suggested, pulling up Shugo’s face and forcing him to look into his eyes again.

His voice was calm and gentle and Shugo felt his chest clench as he listened to him.

“It hurt. Just now it hurt...” Osamu admitted, seeing Shugo nod his head, but before he could turn his face away, Osamu stopped him, holding it tight between his hand, forcing it look back at him.

“I wasn’t finished, Shugo.” He sighed, squinting his eyes with a pout, he shook his head.

“Just listen to what I have to say...because I am trying to wrap my mind around it here.”

Adding another sigh, Osamu continued. “It hurt and although I am not entirely unaware that there are things that go beyond the stuff we had already tried out, I didn’t know you’d like this.” He swallowed, taking the few seconds which he won by that action to find the right words to meet Shugo halfway. “So this is what you are into? What you like?”

He waited for Shugo’s reply.

“Yeah...” Shugo answered flustered.

“Then why didn’t you say anything sooner? Shugo we are dating for a year! Why wouldn’t you mention something like this!? Why didn’t you just casually drop a line like: ‘Hey Samu, you know I like to choke you during sex, what’s good.’ Hu? It is not like you’d want to spank me till I am bruised up and can’t walk for a week.” Osamu suddenly rose his voice imitating Shugo as he took him aback.

Confused and even farther way from his expectation, Shugo was staggered at how quickly this turned into an argument. Tightening his grip on Osamu’s hips to increase the distance between them, he was actuated to explain himself more honestly.

“Bruised up? Wha-“ Shugo repeated perplexed shaking his head, getting back to the point. “How could I have said something like this _casually_? I didn’t say anything sooner, because...because I decided that rather than hurting you or losing you, I thought holding back was the better option than having you hate me. How was I supposed to know that you wouldn’t immediately push me away. I was scared! Fuck! I am scared of disappointing you. Of having you look at me with different eyes. I was scared that you would-“

Snarling, Osamu interrupted him once again, making Shugo’s eyes grow wide as this time it wasn’t words or a hand stopping him from speaking but Osamu’s lips as they sealed back his words. Rolling his hips to let their groins align, Osamu moaned against Shugo’s lips, eyes falling shut while pressing the tip of his tongue against his lips demanding access when Shugo naturally granted it.

Indulged into a passionate kiss emanated from their argument, Shugo’s heart began to throb, hands rushing to pull Osamu closer, groaning into their kiss, wishing for it to last longer when this time Osamu decided to let go to catch his breath.

“Alright.” Osamu sighed, pulling away.

Nodding his head, he rested his forehead against Shugo’s, humming onto his lips while his fingers brushed through the wisps of Shugo’s dark brown hair, enjoying the softness of them tickling against his palms. 

“Okay.” He gasped with a chuckle once more. Kissing Shugo again, tugging on his hair maybe a little too rough before their lips clashed back against each other, taking Shugo by surprise for a second time.

Blinking his eyes, Shugo was lost, so lost he didn’t even response to their kiss when Osamu increased the space between them, trying to read his confused expression with another chuckle.

“What I mean to say is that I am okay with this.”

Reaching down to Shugo’s hands he guided them up to his throat to put them back where they had been before. Carefully and gently holding them in place, he smiled at Shugo.

“If this is what you want to do to feel good, then teach me. Show me everything. I won’t push you away. I am in love with you and I want to make you feel good. I want to try the things you like with you. Together. So show me.”

He sighed with a faint grin to his lips, moving closer to him, he whispered against Shugo’s mouth, dropping the pitch of his voice seductively low.

“Show me what you want, Shugo.”

Grinding his hips down against his boyfriend, he searched his face for a reaction when Shugo moved his hands away from his neck to place them on his shoulders, lips trembling nervously while at the same time very much fighting the urge to push Osamu down.

“Do you know what you are saying? Osamu, if you are not 100% committed to it then it will only hurt you.”

“I know.” He answered without hesitation, making Shugo let out another sigh, shaking his head.

“What if you will regret it?”

“I won’t.” Osamu frowned, brushing back his boyfriend’s hair to kiss his forehead, doing his best to distract him.

“What if-“ Shugo started but Osamu had already enough of his ‘what if’s’, rolling his eyes at him.

“You know, it sounds as if you are trying to argue me out of this.” He laughed frustrated, purposely pressing his cheeks down against Shugo’s groin, feeling his length rub between them.

“I am happy with our sex life as it is, but I noticed for a while that something was off. You seemed kind of out of it...I just didn’t know it was for that reason...” Osamu’s chuckled bittersweet. “...At least not until now.”

Moving his hands down Osamu’s back, Shugo frowned.

“I should have told you sooner.”

“I could have asked sooner.” Osamu countered making Shugo smile.

Grinning teasingly happy, Osamu rested his elbow on Shugo’s shoulder, continuing to brush through his lover’s hair with his fingers, absentmindedly playing with the soft wisps.

“I am glad you told me now...” Osamu smiled, stopping his hand when one more question crossed his mind. Making him tilt his head, Shugo blinked at his eyes noticing something must have distracted Osamu as he was just about to enjoy his touch of having him playing with his hair.

“What’s wrong?” Shugo wondered with a hunch of worry in his tone when Osamu asked without a second thought.

“That thing you like...” He commenced when Shugo helped.

“You mean breath play?”

Squinting his eyes at him for a moment, Osamu nodded.

“Yeah that.” Intentionally not repeating the name. “Do you want me to do it to you too?”

Shugo waited a bit before he nodded his head, reaching for Osamu’s hand, holding on to it before leading it to his lips to kiss his fingertips, eyes fluttering shut, revealing his long eyelashes, he tilted his face further to the side to kiss Osamu’s palm.

“Yes.” Shugo confessed. “Scared?” Twisting his tone into a question, it made Osamu flinch. It was one thing when Shugo wanted to do it to him, he trusted him to know what he was actually supposed to do, but another if he had to do it to Shugo. It never crossed his mind before and he certainly didn’t think he needed it to feel any more pleasure during sex.

However as soon as Osamu thought that, remembered that this was different, this wasn’t about him but about what Shugo wanted. Gaze falling to Shugo’s hand and his lips kissing Osamu’s fingers, he inhaled.

“What if I am.” Osamu flushed, avoiding Shugo’s gaze when Shugo hummed, licking his finger, eyes focused on him.

“I think that’d be fine, since it’ll be your first. It makes me exited taking one more of your firsts that way.” He teased using his low voice, causing Osamu to swallow.

“Talking big for someone who just revealed his kink to me.”

Osamu countered, cleaning his throat when his lips fell open as Shugo began to fondle his body, slowly unbuttoning his shirt while he showered his neck with kisses. Marking his skin in the most obvious way, rapt at knowing other’s will see his mark at that place, even if Osamu tried to hide it with clothes.

“Wait, Shu?! You want to do it now?” His hands rushing into Shugo’s hair, moaning at the feeling of him sucking on his neck, skin hitting against his teeth as the spot began to throb underneath his touch.

He wasn’t sure why, it hasn’t been the first time he left a hickey on him at that place but for some reason, his neck felt strangely sensitive and Osamu could only wonder if it had to do with what Shugo did to him before.

Snickering against the bruised spot, Shugo crooned, eying it with satisfaction like an artist who just finished the last stroke of a painting.

“Not now...” He explained, leaning back to meet Osamu’s eyes.

“I have to explain a few things to you beforehand. It’s not exactly something we can just jump right into, so let’s save that for later.” His eyes flickered with devotion. “But instead...for now, let me make you feel good.”

Getting up from the couch, lifting Osamu into the air with ease, he guided his legs around his waist, switching positions, to press him back down into the cushions.

Catching his breath as his back hit against the softness of their couch, Osamu rushed his hands to Shugo’s abs, making him halt.

“I thought you would want me to tr-“

Tapping a finger on Osamu’s lips, he unbuttoned his shirt further until it unfolded by itself thanks to gravity, exposing his bare chest. Shugo let go of him to continue undressing Osamu’s lower half, pulling on the black strings of his grey sweatpants.

“I said I liked it, not that I needed it.”

Grabbing his waistband while bending forward to kiss his lips, Shugo hummed low, tending to lick his chest before going further below.

“Enough talking about me...Let’s focus on you.”

Feeling Shugo’s hand slip into his pants, Osamu’s body tensed, toes curling.

Shugo’s large hand wrapped around his cock, while his lips began to play with his chest. Licking, nibbling, biting down on his right nipple before sucking on his left, teasing it with the tip of his tongue, his hand began to stroke Osamu’s front.

Smiling as Osamu’s moans became louder Shugo continued to please him.

Twitching to the sensation, Osamu closed his eyes, melting underneath Shugo’s touch as he gave in to him and the pleasure driving through his body.

Today something within their relationship changed and from now on, things wouldn’t be the same as they were before.

* * *

The following days, Osamu noticed that Shugo had become a lot more relaxed around him. The strange distance, that he felt only a couple of days ago, was gone and Osamu couldn’t believe what a difference it made.

After revealing his preference to Osamu, Shugo took his time to teach and explain things more thoroughly to him whenever they had the time. Osamu would ask him questions and Shugo would answer about the places he could touch and would want to be touched, about their safety during the act and how to make sure no harm would be done to the other.

While at the beginning, Osamu was still concerned about the things Shugo showed him and explained to him, going deeper into the subject, he soon had to realise that he became more excited the further he concerned himself with that matter.

Practicing various techniques which Shugo had already taught him, Osamu started to try them out on himself when he took a shower or when he headed to bed earlier than Shugo as he was running late due to his schedule.

Osamu’s curiosity on how it would actually feel during sex grew and he began to look forward to it while Shugo on the other hand, made sure not to rush him, keeping the way they slept with each other the same as before, taking his time to wait for him until Osamu was really willing to.

It was a gesture of commitment towards Osamu for having him accept this part of him and for loving him regardless as well as an admonition to Shugo’s selfishness for dragging Osamu into it.

Osamu appreciated his restraint, but he wondered how much longer he would have to wait for Shugo to realise that he was fine with it and to believe his words that he wanted to finally try it.

* * *

Another week later, a rainy and strangely cold Friday night in spring, Shugo had just finished brushing his teeth in their bathroom after he took a shower, already welcoming the long weekend, when he felt Osamu’s hands wrap around him from behind, kissing his bare back as the heat of his body radiated onto his skin.

Putting away his toothbrush, his lips forming a gentle smile, he turned his head to the side wanting to look at Osamu’s face while placing his own hands onto his.

“What? Are you in need of a cuddle?”

Osamu didn’t say anything, instead he tightened the grip around him, pressing his body closer against Shugo.

Chuckling, Shugo turned back into the mirror, looking at his reflection before he let out a soft sigh, brushing back his hair, to tap Osamu’s hand.

“Osamu, let go of me for a bit, so I can turn around and look at you.”

Osamu’s grip loosening after another hesitant moment, Shugo turned to him, making sure his hands remained on his hips. Meeting Osamu’s eyes, his lips grew an endearing smile realising that he wasn’t wearing anything as Shugo lowered his gaze.

Brushing back Osamu’s hair, he caressed his temples with the tips of thumbs.

“Aren’t you cold?” Shugo asked concerned, but Osamu only shook his head, getting on his toes to decrease the distance between them, reaching for Shugo’s neck, to pull him down into a kiss.

Humming against his lips, Shugo jerked Osamu closer, meeting him halfway, he opened his mouth to Osamu’s tongue.

Osamu lead their kiss as Shugo held him in his arms. Osamu ran his hands down Shugo’s chest, squeezing into his muscles, feeling his nipples poke against the insides of his palms, he moved his leg between Shugo’s thighs, forcing his towel, which was wrapped around his hips, to fall to the ground, the only thing that covered his lower half and remained as the only barrier between their skin.

Shugo growled, and Osamu could feel the subtle change of his groin press against him, making his lips twitch into a pleased grin as he broke their kiss to gasp for air, tilting his head to the other side before clashing back into him.

He wasn’t sure if his resolve was convincing enough for Shugo today, but Osamu knew if he had to wait just one more day, it would have driven him insane and that was something he wouldn’t allow himself to happen.

Forcing Shugo back against the sink, a faint hiss escaping his lips, he felt the cold marbled edges press into his body.

“Shugo.” Osamu moaned, swallowing Shugo’s complaint of pain, he slid his hand back up to Shugo’s neck, guiding him into another kiss.

“Hmm.” Shugo responded, getting drunk from the sweetness of Osamu’s lips as he made their kiss last longer than the previous one before he caught his breath.

They were both struggling for air, holding on to their bodies, exploring them as their hands moved over their curves and muscles, copying each other’s motion while feeling the places they touched tingle underneath their palms.

But Osamu wanted more. He wanted him so bad, he couldn’t think straight anymore. Feeling him inside or being inside him. He didn’t care and neither did it matter, the only thing that did was how much he longed for him.

Fingertips scratching onto Shugo’s skin, he let out a frustrated whine incapable to hold himself back or getting put off anew.

“Fuck me.” Osamu’s eyes fluttered fervent. “Tonight...Let’s do it the way you want to do it.” He moaned again.

Closing his eyes he pulled Shugo back into another rough kiss before he could have given him a chance to hear his reply or another reason to change his mind.

He hated this. The uncertainty as to when Shugo believed him that he was ready. The anticipation whenever they made love and the way this whole thing had occupied Osamu’s mind, making him think of nothing else than that, it was nerve-racking, and he had enough.

Shugo breathed in deep, hands clenching around Osamu’s middle wanting to push him away, to reason him and tell him he didn’t have to rush, that he could still wait if he wasn’t ready, that the thought alone that Osamu was willing to go this far was enough for him.

Shugo had thought of a dozen of excuses the past couple of days. Nevertheless in the end, they were all just excuses, because he too wanted nothing more than give in to his desire, and yet something still stopped him, and he didn’t dare to ask for any more than he was already given.

Once again did he try to convince his boyfriend to wait, but Osamu didn’t let him, as he shook his head kissing Shugo before he even managed to speak.

“Don’t push me away, Shu.” Osamu whispered against his lips, hands slipping into his hair to keep him close as Shugo’s body tensed.

“Osamu.” Shugo’s voice sounded strained, “Don’t make this any harder for me. I really wouldn’t want to rush you into this. Let...let me cherish you.”

Snickering, Osamu rose one of his eyebrows, dropping his gaze down between their bodies to Shugo’s erection, looking so deliciously hard it made his insides twitch.

“I doubt this one could possibly get any harder.” He teased, lifting his chin to meet Shugo’s eyes. “And I already know you are cherishing me. You wouldn’t have held back so long if you didn’t, therefore let me do this. I want this.” Osamu grabbed his cock, giving it a firm grip.

Clicking his tongue, Shugo growled before pushing Osamu back against the cold black tiles of their bathroom walls while making sure to secure the back of his head to prevent him from getting hurt.

“Are you sure?” He rumbled, Osamu’s talent to seduce him already crumbling down his reason.

Ignoring the cold impact from behind him, Osamu’s lips fell open so irresistibly delicious, gasping for air, Shugo was urged to shut them with his own.

“I am.” Osamu hummed, raising his head further to look at Shugo.

Shugo gritted his teeth, turning away, trying to sort his thoughts, he let out a desperate sigh. The excitement slowly starting to control his body looking at Osamu’s expression, he nodded his head.

“I got it...” Shugo frowned, “...but before that. Do you remember your safe word?” Shugo’s voice was stern and serious but Osamu could see how dark his eyes had turned with thirst.

Swallowing eager, Osamu smiled, his hands reaching to cup Shugo’s face.

“Onigiri...My safe word is onigiri...” He replied luring, letting the word roll from his lips in a way no other would have ever voiced it, leaning his head back to let his finger stroke over Shugo’s bottom lip. “...but we don’t need a safe word... I trust you. What about you? Do you trust me?” He asked serious while his eyes seduced him feeling Shugo’s hands running down his waist.

Humming affirmative, Shugo bend forward, breathing against Osamu’s lips as the last bit of reluctance had fallen into Osamu’s trap of temptation. “Of course I trust you.” He exhaled, eyes glowing with want.

This was all they needed.

Shutting his eyes, Osamu lifted his head welcoming Shugo’s mouth, the smile on his lips noticeable even as they kissed. This wasn’t just a kiss, this time it was a sign of agreement and a promise to go through with it as it set their bodies on fire.

Sliding his hand around the small of Osamu’s back, Shugo pulled him closer to deepen their kiss. His hunger for Osamu erupting from deep within him, Shugo claimed his tongue, playing with it the way he wanted to while getting rid of any space that was left between them, pressing their naked bodies against each other.

Osamu groaned into the kiss. He needed that. He needed it so desperately, so hungrily. It wasn't close enough. He licked and nipped at Shugo’s lips, finding them split open again, cool air rushing into his mouth as he kissed him back just as avidly.

Bending his knees, Shugo dropped his hands to the same level as Osamu’s rear, giving it a tight and teasing squeeze before jerking him up without hesitation aligning their cocks next to each other while guiding Osamu’s legs around his hips to make him hold on tight.

“Let’s move this to the bed.” Shugo panted into their kiss.

Osamu didn’t bother to reply with words as his hands wrapped around Shugo’s neck, keeping him close while his legs tightened on his hips.

Shugo pulled him away from the bathroom wall with another moan, carrying him to their bed while relishing the weight of Osamu’s body clinging on to him.

With every step Osamu’s sex rubbed against his abs, teased by every little concussion, craving even the slightest vibration and it wasn’t even nearly sufficient.

Unwilling to let go of Shugo’s lips Osamu kept them locked together until only the impact of his back hitting into the soft sheets of their bed forced them apart as he gasped for air.

Not faltering to move closer to the middle of the bed, he spread his legs to pull Shugo on top of him with a content moan, heat stirring within his body looking at man above him as his eyes wandered down.

Their cocks aligning perfectly next to each other, giving them just a hint of friction, Osamu moaned, licking his lips as Shugo rolled his hips against him, catching Osamu’s attention and directing it down between their bodies.

Shugo’s cock was gorgeous to look at with its 7.9 inches, not that he ever measured it. Long and thick, with a slight curve upwards, perfect to hit Osamu’s delicate spot when inside him as its proportion was balanced beautifully from the tip down to the base which was hugged by the bunches of his black pubes. Veins crested around the shaft like vines, dissolving almost flattering before they were about to reach his circumcised head with its tiny mole to the left side of the tip, flushed in the prettiest shade of red.

The way it hung between his thighs, heavy and hard, so desperate to be touched and paid attention to, Osamu had to lick his lips as his gaze stayed on it.

Unable to deny that Shugo was blessed, Osamu on the other hand knew with confidence he was just as appealing to look at.

Similar in size yet a little smaller and different in shape, Osamu’s cock was more straight-lined than Shugo’s. His skin a bit lighter and flushed in a softer burgundy colour than Shogo although Osamu inclined to grow darker when he was close to coming which had been one of the things Shugo loved to watch each time he used his mouth on him.

Letting out a deep and throaty moan, Shugo thrusted his hips again, rubbing their lengths next to each other, when Osamu’s eyes moved back to Shugo’s.

“Ahhh...again! Do that again.” He pleaded, hands clutching onto Shugo’s thick thighs as Shugo followed his plea immediately.

“You like this?” He repeated the same motion. Putting more weight into his action, he increased the friction as he ran his hand over Osamu’s legs. Holding on to his knee pit, he laid them on his shoulder, rocking his hips a few more times, rubbing their cocks together before he stopped to let Osamu’s feet touch the sheets again.

“Osamu, I want you.” Shugo uttered, his loose hair fallen into his face making him appear even more stunning in Osamu’s eyes.

“Yes, but I want you to lick me first. I want to feel your tongue here.” Osamu responded, moving his hands below his thighs to spread his cheeks, exposing himself entirely, feeling no shame or embarrassment, just comfortableness and trust.

“That’s quite tempting,” Shugo declared with a daring smile, brushing back his hair to get them out of the way, only to have them fall back as soon as he pulled his hand away. “Would you do it for me as well? I want to be ready when it’s your turn.” Shugo suggested and Osamu wondered if it was possible to fall more in love with Shugo than he already was.

He loved every bit of him. His selflessness and kindness as much as his tend to grow upset over things that bothered him and made him lose his cool. All his perfections and imperfections. His perfect body and gorgeous looks as well as the stretch marks on his hips and his arms from having gained his muscles too fast. Osamu loved all of it and yet, with lines like this, that put them on equal grounds, Osamu could feel his heart throb against his chest for wanting this man so much, it made his mind a mess.

Grinning flirty, he nodded at him, letting go of his cheeks to put his arms flat on the bed.

“Then turn around and get over here.” He smirked.

“Well aren’t we demanding today?” Shugo chuckled making Osamu frown playfully.

“You don’t like it?”

Shugo was at a loss for words as he sat back on his heels, ready to switch positions.

“How would I ever not like it?”

He countered, turning around, he raised one leg above Osamu’s body to put it down onto the bed next to his head. Crawling into position, Shugo shivered at the touch of Osamu’s lips licking the back of his thighs as soon as he was positioned in a way that made this possible while pushing his hips further to pay attention to his cock.

“Mhm...” He purred in agreement, gently cupping Shugo’s cock as if it was something fragile, rubbing it against his cheek, feeling a particular type of warmth tickling inside his stomach. “Ahh...looks delicious.”

Osamu crooned as Shugo clicked his tongue, in denial how much more Osamu was going to talk him into it, when he was already unable to resist.

“You little...” He started but before he could finish what he was supposed to say, he had already dipped forward, deciding this would be the fastest way to make him shut up.

And it worked as Osamu whimpered, hand grasping around Shugo’s cock more tightly, sliding it through his fingers, feeling the slickness of his precum spreading in the palm of his hands. Shugo shifted, lowering his head to put it within easier reach, as his tongue rasped up Osamu’s thighs again.

“Shugo!” Osamu whined kissing Shugo’s tip, only to squeal in delight when he felt Shugo’s tongue dip between his cheeks, lapping at his hole only for a moment before pulling away.

“How do you like this?” Shugo pushed, licking a line down Osamu’s hard cock, further to his balls and his perineum.

“Still up for a conversation?” He growled, hands wrapped around Osamu’s calves, pushing them apart, splaying his legs wider, to give him full access to every part of Osamu’s body, knowing very well now what he liked and where he wanted it as Shugo bit Osamu’s ass, hearing him cry out as he brushed over the new mark with his tongue. Flushing in a deep crimson tone, so very appealing in comparison to the rest of Osamu’s rather delicate and light-coloured skin.

Osamu groaned, toes curling and heat boiling, rising to a dire need, he didn’t waver to suck on the head of Shugo’s cock wanting to have a taste of him as well.

Dragging his lips up the side, he slid his hands over Shugo’s celestial shaped ass, touching him, while letting his finger roll over his skin. Opening his lips, he embraced Shugo’s cock.

Greedy and desperate, he pressed Shugo’s hips down, guiding his ass while his lips slid further up Shugo’s sex until he felt the tip reach the end of his shaft, frowning with frustration, Osamu choked.

He shut his eyes, forcing his throat to relax to take in just a bit more as the pain told him he had reached his limit, whimpering around the cock in his mouth before he pulled out with a squelching gasp, repeating the same thing again and again.

If it wasn’t for Shugo’s talent to hold himself back, which he had especially refined over the course of the past 12 months, and the desire to devour as much of the pleasure Osamu gave to him, feeling the tightness of his throat clench to his cock as he stuffed him, controlling his breath, Shugo would have cum inside his mouth right away.

Fortunately, Shugo made every effort on trying to last long and be patient.

Doing his best to not accidently move his hips himself as the temptation was quite powerful, Shugo swiped his own tongue over Osamu’s rim, licking at the twitching spot before diving in, thrusting into the tightness.

“Relax for me, Samu.” Shugo breathed.

Long slender fingers skilfully joining his tongue only a moment later as Osamu jolted to the touch, trying to follow his lover’s words.

Examining his insides for something within the fluttering ring of muscle, Shugo spread him open. At first gentle and patient but then fiercer and faster, almost impatient.

Osamu nearly chocked on Shugo’s cock, pulling away to gaps for air when he felt the pads of his finger rubbing inside him while his tongue teased him from outside, both searching for something, Osamu knew which would make him loose it as soon as Shugo aimed at it.

“Don’t...no...Shu-...ahh...-go...! Ahhh!” Osamu stuttered, fingers clenching into Shugo’s ass, making him flinch at the pain, yet ignoring it blithely.

Shugo wouldn’t go easy on him, at least not today as he already pushed his right middle finger into him, joining the other two that had already entered him with ease while using his saliva as slick.

It was a feeling Osamu could hardly describe, but if he had to it was almost completely separate from himself, a pungent and unknown sensation. 

Hips quivering, Osamu shut his eyes to continue where he left off before Shugo had forced him to stop.

Every one of Osamu’s moans were echoed by Shugo, pleasured by the hum of Osamu’s throat as he put him back inside his mouth, sucking him off while Shugo found and directed his teasing towards Osamu’s prostate.

Thrusting and rubbing, against the swell, Osamu could hardly keep his legs from squirming when he let go of Shugo’s cock, whining at the pleasure.

“Shu...stop there!... Any more than this and I will cum...argh!” He cried but instead Shugo rimmed him more intensely, stirring with his fingers inside him as he took a moment to speak.

“This spot here is your weakness, right? Don’t hold back...Cum for me.” Shugo panted, taking another second to catch his breath before continuing what he was doing, pushing Osamu to the edge.

Osamu came, spilling against Shugo’s and his own chest as Shugo continued to lick him. Sucking him harder before pulling away to lick the glistening droplets that remained on the tip of his cock away from his gland.

“Delicious.” Shugo hummed, an inuendo to Osamu’s previous utterance.

Osamu’s eyes rolled back in his head.

“Idiot! I told you to stop.” He protested with a pout making Shugo snicker as he kissed the inside of his thighs, sucking a bit too long, leaving another mark on his body.

“I am sorry, I must have been too distracted to notice.” Shugo was smooth, way too smooth.

“Distracted my ass...You did it on purpose.” Osamu countered, sulking just for fun when his hand slid south. Collecting some of his release.

“At least I can use that somewhere else now.”

Lubricating his fingers, he moved his hand to cup the tight muscle of Shugo’s perfectly shaped ass, sticking just above his face.

Pressing his finger against his entrance, making him groan deep, growling deliciously as Shugo spread his legs further, chest sinking down onto Osamu’s thighs, feeling his finger push inside him.

“Yes, babe...Mmh...yes like that. I want you.” Shugo gasped, tossing his head back while giving Osamu’s leg a tight squeeze, a groan deeper than before ripping through him as Osamu began to loosen him.

Taking his cock back between his lips, Osamu stirred gently forward with his fingers.

Shugo was tight. Tighter than Osamu and it was difficult to put in more than one finger at a time, but in comparison to Osamu, Shugo possessed the talent to loosen up faster than his boyfriend and eventually he opened up, providing Osamu enough leeway to drive in.

Shugo rolled his hips, sliding more of his cock down Osamu’s throat making him taste the saltiness of the small drops that proofed how much Shugo loved this, as his finger began to spread him, stimulating the area which Osamu knew made Shugo moan out, radiating the sweetest sounds.

Continuing to suck him off, he could feel Shugo clench around him instinctively.

“Ahh...Samu!....Argh...fuck...fuck...fuck...fuck! Urgh!”

Shugo moaned beautifully to Osamu’s strokes as he relaxed enough for him to enter another finger. Joining it, he stretched his hole further, the cool air brushing against his heated skin, tickling at the spot.

Shugo shuddered from the unwanted yet somewhat alluring sensation, grabbing Osamu’s legs, feeling it more strongly than usual.

“Osamu enough...That is good enough...ahh!” He moaned but Osamu wouldn’t want to stop, tending to his sweet spot inside to rub against his prostate when Shugo rose his upper body, reaching back to grab Osamu’s wrist, forcing him to stop, cheeks flushed and out of breath.

“Samu, no....not like this...Not yet...” Shugo panted, turning far enough back to meet Osamu’s eyes when seeing his expression changed the game and forced another pleasant shudder through Shugo’s body, pooling in the depths of his insides screaming at his mind for more, as Osamu’s finger stilled inside him.

Osamu’s eyes were piercing through him, glowing with desire as the need for something bigger than just fingers became stronger, taking over Shugo’s intentions as he let go of Osamu’s hand. Biting down on his bottom lip, an unbridled heat running through his body like a fever, he dropped his head to his chest, enjoying his lover’s touch a while longer before he turned back to him. Shugo was vulnerable and desperate to feel Osamu inside him, filling the void his fingers weren’t able to reach.

“Osamu...make ...make me cum when you are inside of me.” Shugo murmured only to have Osamu’s hungry eyes flicker with surprise, looking startled at him.

“I...I thought you-“ 

Osamu began, pulling back his fingers, leaving Shugo with an unwelcomed emptiness as he gasped from the loss, pressing his palms into Osamu’s thighs to compensate with the loss, sighing frustrated, having to explain himself.

“I...I know what I said...but I changed my mind...” He begged. “Please, give me yours.”

Shugo reached down to grasp Osamu’s sex, smiling delighted to see how fast he had already recovered from his previous orgasm. Youth was really something amazing, Shugo thought in the back of his mind that was not entirely consumed by lust and the desire to be filled by the cock of his boyfriend six years younger than him.

“Put it in me.” Shugo whined, a side which he was only ever able to show to Osamu and which he only ever wanted Osamu to see.

Immersed in what he suggested, Osamu caressed Shugo’s thighs, letting his hands move up to his hips before sliding down to his knees, almost as if he was soothing his boyfriend.

“Are you sure?” Osamu blushed, sitting up to kiss Shugo’s spine, gently licking against his heated skin when Shugo changed positions with one fluent motion to get on top of him, sinking down into his lap, letting his cheeks swallow Osamu’s length to rub himself against him as his hands pressed against Osamu’s chest, pushing him down into the bed.

“Yes.” Shugo cooed, arching forward to kiss him. Saliva mixing together with the lingering tastes of themselves remaining their tongues. Shugo moaned, rocking his hips back into Osamu’s cock, while devouring their sweet and salty kiss full of love.

“Or am I too eager?” Shugo laughed flustered, sounding a little troubled when Osamu put his hands onto Shugo’s hips, grinning as he shook his head.

“No.” He admitted, pulling Shugo close enough to let their lips brush, he breathed against them. “You got me excited as well.”

“Ahh...I am glad.” Shugo smiled, reaching to brush back Osamu’s hair, cupping his face as he nuzzled against the palm of his hand.

“I love it when you get excited because of me.” His voice was gentle and deep but for a moment Osamu could see a frown growing between his brows.

Mirroring his expression, he adjusted his head on the pillows, tilting it to the side as if that action would allow him to see through Shugo’s thoughts.

“Shugo?”

There was no immediate reply, instead Shugo eased his hands over Osamu’s upper body, leaning closer to capture his lips in a passionate kiss. Taking his time to savour it, panting against him, when after a while he let go of him to press his forehead onto Osamu’s.

“Nothing, it’s just...I wondered how much more you will make me love you.”

Laughing relieved, having thought something wasn’t right, Osamu hummed, letting his body arch up against Shugo, pulling his hips closer.

“I just thought the same a moment ago.”

Shugo let out a defeated growl, unable to ignore the throbbing heat of Osamu’s cock rubbing against him from below, reason enough for him to stretch back and grab the base of his cock, aligning it towards his entrance to grind against it.

“Ahhh god, I think I really am losing my mind. Hurry, I want you in me.” Shugo murmured impatient.

Ready to ease it in himself, he was interrupted when Osamu held on to Shugo’s hips, rolling them over to push Shugo down into the sheets, jerking his body closer as if he weight nothing desperate his huge build making his thighs rest onto top of his, grinding his hips against him.

“Let me do it.” He demanded, spreading Shugo’s legs apart to reveal his delicate spot, twitching cutely as he brushed over his skin. Stroking the insides of his thighs before leaning closer, he supported his body with his left hand as his other moved down to his cock.

Jerking it a few times, he let his head rub against Shugo’s hole, pausing for a moment to calm in order to not rush and not hurt him.

“Tell me if it hurts,” he asked attentive, “...and lead me when you want me to touch you in that way.” Osamu added with a smile, watching Shugo’s lips fall open, inhaling sharply.

Lifting his arms towards Osamu’s face, Shugo brushed through his hair, caressing his head until his palms stopped at his neck to give him a gentle squeeze, needing him closer.

“Put it in and then get your lips back over here and kiss me.” He breathed, raring to go and not the least bit wanting Osamu to hold back as his need grew stronger.

Osamu didn’t waver another second, spitting on his cock to smear some of his saliva onto the tip and Shugo’s entrance, before pushing his fingers in one more time to assure he was loose enough.

“Here I go.” He warned once, grinding his hips when in the next moment he held his cock and eased it inside.

Feeling the tip poke at him, Shugo relaxed, wrapping his arms around Osamu.

“Mhm...like that...more.”

Osamu frowned then pushed. Going past the clenching ring of muscles, he dove further into Shugo until half of him was seated inside as their lips clashed together in a messy and sloppy kiss.

Toes curling by the thickness of Osamu’s sex, Shugo held Osamu close, prurient to feel his lips.

“Deeper...”

One hand clutching down to Osamu’s ass, squeezing his cheek to get him to push it in deeper, his other clenched into his hair, pulling him down into the kiss, humming pleasantly against his lips as he felt Osamu’s breath meet his.

It was like coming home, Osamu thought. Shugo’s tightness felt marvellous around him. Thrusting deeper, inch by inch getting swallowed, accepted by Shugo, looking so irresistibly attractive, Osamu could only moan in pleasure, feeling the man he loved all around him.

Knotting his legs behind his boyfriend, Shugo held on to Osamu as he let out a husky groan, tensing his body when he felt Osamu hitting his deepest spot, he dipped his lips forward into a brief kiss.

“Mhm...feels good...Osamu...just like that. Give it to me.” He growled, sticking his tongue out just to have Osamu greet it with the moist warmth of his mouth, indulging into the kiss as his thrusts became harder and faster.

Shugo’s insides wanting to protest from the rougher intrusion as his cock lost its stiffness for the time being adjusting to the sensation while welcoming Osamu inside him.

It felt good and as much as the pain was a distraction, so was the pleasure of possessing a body that made Osamu carry the expression he showed Shugo right now as his cheeks flushed and his brows furrowed to the delight of being inside him.

Chuckling tenderly, as his hand left Osamu’s ass to place it over his cock, wanting to cover up his current state, he kissed Osamu’s again.

“Feeling good?” Shugo panted in between Osamu’s thrusts.

“Very.” Osamu sighed content, thrusting into him once when they eyes met. “It feels amazing inside you.” He panted, letting his hand wander down to the place of their connection, wanting to touch the area of their bond when he noticed Shugo’s state and stilled.

The previous frown deepening, he opened his lips, wanting to say something when Shugo could already read his lover’s thoughts, catching his question before it left his lips.

“Shhh...I am fine...you know that this can happen.” He soothed but Osamu didn’t seem to accept that as he clicked his tongue, sitting back on his heels to put more space between them, substituting Shugo’s hand with his own.

“I want you to feel good too.” Osamu frowned, holding on to Shugo’s member before wrapping his hand around him.

Growling at the warmth of Osamu’s heated hand, Shugo’s had been slightly cold which didn’t necessarily help with that issue, he leaned forward to kiss Osamu’s chin, licking his neck just to chuckle dearly, seeing Osamu’s concerned face when only a moment ago it was so full of desire.

“Babe, don’t look so tense. I am fine. Please, move.”

Osamu sighed, lowering his head down on Shugo’s chest trying to sort his mind, as his free hand seeked Shugo’s to let their fingers intertwine on the sheets.

“It feels amazing inside you but this all meaningless if it is just me feeling good.” Osamu fretted only to make Shugo chuckle. Not in a way as if he was making fun of him, but more like understanding how he felt. Arching forward to kiss Osamu’s cheek, he brushed back his bangs, smiling at him as his the heat of Osamu’s hand and the change of position made his blood rush back into his member, making it hard inside Osamu’s hand.

“You already make me feel good, look.” He requested and Osamu pointed his head between their bodies, glancing at his cock. “See...” Shugo hummed.

Osamu moaned, jerking his hips while bending down to kiss Shugo again, panting between their caresses, he shoved Shugo’s hand into the mattress.

“Ahhh...but let’s go slower...” He requested. “Let me make you feel even better, Shu.”

Shugo knew what he meant as he nodded his head, the thrill of letting his desires free unifying inside him, burned through his body as he swallowed.

Exhaling hard, Shugo pressed his legs against Osamu’s body, having him pull his hips closer, having Shugo feel the jerk extending into him as Osamu thrusted. A pleasant gasp left his lips from the impact of Osamu’s cock, causing him to flinch.

“Osamu,” he panted tense, letting go of Osamu’s hand, to wrap his fingers around his wrist, guiding it to his throat. “…start moving and…touch me here. Hold on to it the way I showed you.”

Shugo let go of him, dropping his hand to Osamu’s thighs, encouraging him to move his hips as he felt Osamu’s thumb stroke over his neck, watching him lick his lips.

Sliding almost entirely out of him just to slam it right back into him, Osamu huffed. The sensation of Shugo’s walls clasping on to him, sucking him deeper in just felt too good.

Rolling his hips, he rocked Shugo back and forth into the sheets, taking his time before gradually picking up on speed as he tightened his grip on Shugo’s neck, making sure to spare his trachea when he immediately felt Shugo’s reaction as he clamped around him.

Hissing out, he softened his grip only to have Shugo’s hand rush back on to his wrist making him squeeze it again.

“No! ...More…keep it as it is.” Shugo pled feeling Osamu stiffen his grip as their eyes met.

Ardent with passion and want, Shugo almost looked like he was begging for more and Osamu felt his gaze run through his body like electricity, setting every fibre of him on fire.

Lead on by Shugo’s expression, Osamu followed his request, increasing the strength to his touch while his hips pushed harsher and sterner, making Shugo clench onto their bedsheets.

“Yes...ahh!” Shugo choked.

Lowering his gaze down to the place of their connection, he watched his cock pull in and out of Shugo. Swallowing him completely before releasing him again as with every motion he seemed to wring him harder while holding on to his neck.

Osamu sensed Shugo’s pulse pounding against his palms, fluttering like the wings of a butterfly. If he concentrated enough to pay it more attention, he was certain it would have tickled, but his focus was set on other things.

Jerking his hips, he made sure to keep the same pressure onto his neck.

The impact controlling and partly cutting off his breath, Shugo tipped his hips forward to meet Osamu’s actions, letting the pain and pleasure dominate his body as Osamu leaned closer, slightly loosening his grip.

“Open your lips.” Osamu panted and Shugo followed with delight, raising his arms to hold on to Osamu as he altered his hand to his neck, sliding his fingers slightly back towards his nape.

“You feel so tight, Shu.”

Groaning out Shugo caught his breath, fingers sliding into Osamu’s soft wisps, he deepened his kiss making it almost impossible for him to breath as the overstimulation and denial of air set his whole body on fire. 

His erection poking against Osamu’s abs, rubbing between their bodies and feeding from the tiniest friction Osamu’s thrusts offered to them, satisfying its natural urge to find release.

Shugo’s cheeks flushed even redder than after a full body workout he moaned against Osamu’s lips.

“More! ...S-Samu....argh...harder. Feels so good!”

And Osamu lost it.

Holding on to Shugo’s neck, Shugo clenched onto the base of his cock each time he squeezed his grip for the count of a few seconds assuring he got enough oxygen in between, until it became almost impossible for him to move, although Shugo demanded him to. 

It was as if Osamu was lead on by a force that was hidden deep within the pits of his soul and was only able to come forth on Shugo’s request as he understood the thrill of Shugo’s kink.

Something dark and prideful reared inside him, possessive and hungry. Osamu closed his eyes, letting his head fall back, jolting his hips.

Desperation creping over him, he kept his pace with his thrusts, veins bulging on his arms leading to his wrist and hand holding on to Shugo. Controlling him, watching him fall apart beneath him.

Shugo’s vision grew hazy from what Osamu did to him and he wondered why he was trying to stop him so many times when he could have had this a week ago already.

Regret and desire battling within his mind, his hands clutched onto Osamu’s body, squeezing his chest, feeling his briskly heartbeat hammering against his palms as his thrusts dragged him closer to the edge.

They both became victims to the sensation.

Shugo’s legs winced each time Osamu pound into him, unable to voice his cries, his moans suppressed by Osamu’s firm grip, pleasantly strong yet strangely gentle. Shugo never felt this way before and it made him feel so good, it was like floating.

Jerking eagerly, Osamu clenched and unclenched his grip on Shugo’s neck never too loose or too strong, feeling his orgasm draw near. Trying to catch his breath he gasped for air, letting go of Shugo’s throat he caressed his collarbone, sliding his fingers back to his nape he bend down to kiss him, brushing back his own hair.

“Shugo...I am ...I am about to...” Osamu panted, one hand clenching into the fabric of their bedsheets next to Shugo’s head while his other remained on Shugo.

“Me too...” Shugo growled in reply prior to Osamu getting a chance to finish his sentence. 

Shugo’s cheeks flushed, sliding his hands up to Osamu’s face, stroking over his lips, swollen from their kisses.

“Make us cum, Osamu.”

Putting his arms around Osamu’s shoulders, he forced him forward into a kiss.

Moaning against it, Osamu increased the speed as he let his hand move down between them to his cock, jerking him off as he could hardly restrain his own orgasm pooling deep inside him, waiting to be released.

Pushing and grinding his hips a few more times, Shugo’s fingers dug into Osamu’s hair.

Groaning out, deep and husky, Osamu quivered on top of him as his warmth filled Shugo’s insides, coming inside him.

His release coating his walls, gushing into him, while Shugo met Osamu’s irregular jolts with his own thrusts.

Demanding his lips, Shugo panted against them, while Osamu continued to play with his front.

Muffling his moans and controlling the access of air not with his hand but with his lips as they held their kiss, Osamu kept stroking Shugo’s cock, flushing in a delicate shade of red until he spilled into his palms, finding release only a moment after Osamu.

Spurting onto their abs, Shugo groaned deep, feeling Osamu’s heat cramming him as the waves of pleasure washed through his body, making Shugo tense before he slacked.

Collapsing on top of Shugo’s chest, not minding the stickiness of their bodies, Shugo wrapped his arms around him, caressing his spine, drawing meaningless lines with the tip of his fingers as he rode the last waves of his high.

Breaths heavy, the smell of sex and sweat thick in the air, they laid entangled with each other on the bed.

Even by the time they caught their breaths, neither of them wanted to budge, enjoying the closeness of the aftermath.

The first one who moved was Osamu, supporting his weight with his arms, he slid out of Shugo to lay down beside him, moving close enough to hold on to each other, he snuggled himself against Shugo.

Lazily lifting his head to look at him, he met Shugo’s gaze, eyes quickly wandered to the redness of Shugo’s neck and the marks he left on him.

“Shugo.” Osamu probed, gently caressing the red spots with his finger pads. “Does it hurt?” He asked before tilting his head to meet his eyes again.

Shugo’s voice sounded hoarse and husky but his expression was full of love as he continued to caress Osamu’s back.

“It doesn’t....” He assured him, looking concerned.

“How was it for you?”

Osamu turned away, staring at the bedroom ceiling, letting the events from just now repeat in his mind as the memory was so vivid before answering with a satisfied grin.

“I can see now why you like this...I tried to understand it and I thought I did, but only now...” Osamu frowned, rolling to the side to face Shugo properly. “...now I can say I really understand it... it felt incredibly good.”

Shugo’s lips built a smile before he even noticed it himself, grabbing Osamu’s chin, to turn his face to him.

“Hearing you say that makes me exceedingly happy, Samu.” Shugo blinked, pulling Osamu back into his embrace.

They remained like this for a while longer, when the only thing interrupting the silence filled with their synced heartbeats, were the hollow noises from outside the window as the cars were passing by their apartment block.

Feeling warm and relaxed Osamu snuggled closer, lifting his left leg to rest it on Shugo’s lap, as he opened his thighs for the comfort only to cross his right leg above Osamu’s calves, tangling them together. Offering his arm to Osamu to use it as pillow, he placed a kiss onto his hair.

“Are you tired? Do you want to sleep?” Shugo asked.

Osamu appreciated the suggestion, since he did feel a little more exhausted than he would have wanted to admit, but that didn’t mean he wanted to sleep yet.

Nuzzling his face against Shugo’s chest, he sighed softly.

“I am not tired...” He paused himself, shifting inside Shugo’s arms. “And correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t it your turn?” Osamu tempted as he was very much still up for another round.

Sliding his hand down Shugo’s chest to his cock, grinning mischievous feeling it against his palm.

“And it looks like this here deserves to be given more attention. Guess my concern from before was unnecessary.”

“Mhm...indeed...it wants to be inside you.”

Shugo growled pulling away his arm from underneath Osamu’s head to bend over him, dipping far enough down to meet his lips in a lazy kiss, tracing his tongue down his neck to the spot where he had marked him before.

“You taste so sweet.”

“I taste salty...I am a mess.” Osamu chuckled, inhaling sharply, his hands finding their way into Shugo’s hair as Shugo left another hickey on him, this time just above his collarbone before he let go of him, to grin playfully.

“Mhm...Not yet...but I am sure to make a mess out of you soon.” Shugo promised, emitting another moan out of Osamu in anticipation, spreading his legs to wrap them around Shugo’s waist.

“Ahh...can’t wait for that.”

Caressing Osamu’s thighs causing him to whimper form the stimulation, Shugo licked his lips, guiding his legs away from his hips to shift above him, making enough room for Osamu, he sat back on his heels, as the new position caused Osamu’s cum trickling down from inside him, making him hum as the thick sticky fluid soiled the sheets underneath him.

His voice rippling through Osamu’s body, Shugo’s eyes glistened with want as he pulled back his hair, shivering to the loss of Osamu’s cum, his hand slid down his neck, to his chest and over his abs until he reached his cock, giving it demonstratively a few strokes for Osamu to see.

“Turn around and rise your hips.” He requested, desiring to give Osamu his fill too.

Swallowing hard, Osamu wound his body until he was facing the bedsheets, getting down on all fours he turned to the side, chest pressing down onto the bed, he lifted his ass.

“Like this?” Osamu asked, when Shugo growled behind him.

“Yes, like that.”

Exploring Osamu’s entire body as if it was his first time, Shugo held his breath, reaching for Osamu’s back. Letting his hand rest flat on it, he skidded it over him, fingertips feeling out his spine coming closer to Osamu’s hips as he exhaled.

“You are so gorgeous.”

Osamu wasn’t given the time to reply in any type of way sensing Shugo’s finger moving past his tailbone to the space between his cheeks before they pushed into him.

“Ahh, you are so soft.” Shugo hummed. “It’s so easy to just-“

He left his sentence unfinished, as his words turned into a long moan, pressing Osamu’s chest down into the sheets while he led his cock into the twitching place.

Meeting Shugo’s groan, Osamu pressed his face into the sheets to supress his voice, feeling Shugo enter him. Gasping at his first push, hitting him unexpectedly deep, Osamu clenched into the sheets.

Crying out frustrated as Shugo aimed for his prostate with one smooth and skilful thrust, knowing his body too well, he reached back to grab Shugo’s thigh, pinching into his flesh.

“Slower!”

Osamu grumbled, wanting to pull away but Shugo held on to his body, wrapping his arm around the small of Osamu’s waist, stroking his stomach as he stirred inside him, holding himself back as good as he could.

“I am sorry...Forgive me, please.” He murmured, stopping his motion.

“Never.” Osamu countered with a fleeting pout blossoming in his tone.

“Ahh... then I am left with no other choice than convince you to forgive me.” Shugo moaned, tipping his hips a hunch further, sliding even deeper into him.

Pleasure flitting over Osamu’s face, he couldn’t help but give in to it as he felt Shugo throb against the inside of his walls. Burying any faint flicker of pain away, Osamu moved his hips, leading Shugo on as he slid the last inch of his cock inside.

“S-Shugo!” Osamu grunted once Shugo was entirely seated inside of him panting against his back with a strained smile.

“Ahh, I wish I could stay inside you forever.”

“Feeling this good?” Osamu chuckled, his insides remembering his shape, while Shugo stilled, showering Osamu’s back with fluttering kisses, his tongue trailing down the line of his back, Osamu enjoyed the distraction as Shugo’s weight pressed against him, leaning his forehead against his nape.

Laughing blithe, Shugo’s mind grew hazy from the rising desire to rock his hips as he pleased, he let out a deep heartfelt sigh when Osamu clenched on to his cock, deliciously tight.

“Mhm...I want to move.” Murmuring against him, he tilted his head, lips placing another sweet kiss onto Osamu’s nape.

Blinking his eyes before smiling tenderly, Osamu turned his face to the side, panting a few times to win time to adjust before he spoke.

“Move. I think I am fine now...I can take it.” Osamu hummed, arching towards Shugo’s arm that helped supporting Shugo’s weight to kiss it and hold on to.

“Are you sure?” Shugo asked tense.

Laughing softly, Osamu nuzzled against him.

“Yes...Captain.” He teased. “Don’t hold back. Fuck me however you like. I will take it all.”

Shugo needed no second invitation to that as he moved his hips.

Shugo’s cock slipping almost entirely out of him as he moved his hips, leaving Osamu back with a shudder from the denial of warmth before he slammed it right back into him. Letting go of Osamu’s back, Shugo slid his hands down to his hips, rolling the smooth skin of his ass under his fingers. The feeling of his muscles tensing underneath his touch forcing Shugo to growl at the sensation and Osamu’s words.

“Osamu!” Shugo warned. “Don’t regret what I am going to do to you if you keep stirring me up.”

Shaking his head Osamu ground his hips against him, his cock kissing the air as it hung heavy between his legs, swinging to the motion of his hips.

“I won’t...ahh!”

Osamu groaned unable to utter another word, as Shugo leaned closer, meeting Osamu’s lips to let their tongues clutter messily into a passionate kiss, meeting in the space between them before vanishing in each other’s mouths.

Squeezing Osamu’s ass, Shugo held their kiss as he withdrew his hips only far enough to thrust back into him right away. Steadily copying the same motion again and again until he picked up on speed, beginning to rock his hips in fluid motions.

Shugo’s tongue infiltrating the inside of Osamu’s mouth, keeping him from speaking, feeling Shugo’s cock stir inside of him, filling him up as he dragged his length in and out.

Hot and long, it was as if he could feel it pierce through him, poking against his stomach from the inside. A sensation so intense, it was maddening how much Osamu loved it.

It was one thing being inside Shugo, but having the choice of feeling Shugo penetrate him was definitely just as prodigious.

Hands pulling on the bedsheets, Osamu clenched into the fabric, drowning into the pleasure.

His lips barely able to withstand the desire to moan, Osamu broke their kiss to gasp for air, husky breathes pouring against the heat of Shugo’s mouth, glistening with saliva.

“So good! Harder...Shugo! Fuck me!”

Clicking his lips, Shugo shifted briefly on top of him to adjust his position, caressing Osamu’s skin while providing his body balance with his dominant hand bracing on the bed as his other slid around him to his mouth.

“As you wish.” He whispered, placing his hand onto his mouth, sparing his nose to pull him on his knees, making him raise his body as he fucked into him. Osamu’s back hitting against Shugo’s chest while the squelching sounds of their connection overwrote the creaking noises of their bed.

“Mhm!” Osamu protested as his hands clutched onto Shugo’s arm covering his mouth, making it harder for him to breath but not impossible as he felt Shugo’s thrust turn fiercer.

Closing his eyes, as he noticed Shugo’s free hand began to press amiably against the lower region of his stomach, he shivered to the low rumble of his voice against his ear. 

“I am so deep inside you, feels so good. Fuck haa...ahhh...so tight.”

Gone was Osamu’s rationality as he felt the heat in his body burn. Osamu could still breathe through his nose, but because of Shugo’s hand holding on to his mouth, forcing it to remain shut, his mind started to become foggy.

It was a thrill different to when he held on to Shugo’s neck and in the back of his head he wondered if he wasn’t gonna do it to him the same way, yet he was certain for the one to give, the sensation must have been the same, as he heard Shugo grunt into his ear, pleasure rising and pervading his entire body.

Directing his thrust in a way that made Osamu melt, Shugo’s cock nudged against the spot Osamu loved the most, enjoying the feeling of his insides clenching around him lusciously tight, Shugo opted to go change things up a little bit as the haunting sensation of Osamu’s cock inside him spurred him on to give it to Osamu the same way he did it to him .

Letting go of Osamu’s mouth, hand dripping with saliva, Shugo paused his thrusts, panting behind Osamu as he gasped for air.

Breath raged, Osamu coughed, welcoming the coolness of their bedsheets as he turned to the side, when Shugo already lifted his left thigh to turn him around without having to pull out.

Feeling him twist inside as they remained connected, Osamu whined to the sensation only to have Shugo cover his mouth with a soothing kiss by the time Osamu found himself laying on his back facing him.

“Sorry...I am-” Shugo panted against him when he jerked him close, thrusting into him again as Osamu’s eyes rolled back.

How could he go even deeper, it made no sense and yet Osamu felt as if he could feel him up to his throat.

A hushed moan suppressed by Shugo’s lips evaded Osamu’s when he got rid of the little room between them, clinging onto to his broad back.

Clicking his tongue, weak to Osamu’s noises, Shugo sighed. Pulling him into another ardent kiss, he bend forward, adjusting his position before lifting his hand to cover Osamu’s mouth again.

Osamu gasped before having Shugo’s hand silence his moans.

Jerking Osamu further up the bed while not once pulling out of him, Shugo sat back on his heels, watching Osamu squirm underneath him as he thrusted into him, pressing his hand against Osamu’s mouth while his other moved to his cock. Wrapping his fingers loosely around it, he left his hand laying on Osamu’s stomach, giving him only friction through the thrusts of his hips.

Osamu wasn’t sure if he was actually serious in making him cum or just playing at him but whatever his intentions were, Osamu wouldn’t want to complain as the things Shugo did to him drove away all of his reason.

Licking his lips, Shugo moaned, watching Osamu’s frown from the stimulation and denial all the same.

“Ahhh...I want to come inside you so hard.”

Osamu groaned having Shugo let go of his mouth to kiss his wet lips. Welcoming his tongue, Osamu’s hands rushed to his back, scratching his skin as Shugo slowly dragged his cock out before shoving it back inside with a deep growl, letting go of Osamu’s lips, to give him a change to speak.

“Ahhh, Shugo...Yeah! ... Mhm! Argh! Inside! Make a mess out to me!” Osamu cried, feeling Shugo’s lips clash into his again in the next moment, claiming his tongue, he tightened his left hand around Osamu’s cock to jerk him off while sliding his other around his neck to keep him close. 

“Shugo!” Osamu whined again, feeling Shugo hit against his delicate spot as he broke their kiss.

Shugo grinned, pearls of sweat dripping down the frame of his face as his husky deep voice resonated within Osamu’s stomach.

“I heard you,” he assured, “I heard you and I’ll give you what you want....I will make you my mess.”

Osamu had to smile at the way he phrased it as he let his hand join Shugo’s, playing with his front while Shugo thrusted into his back.

Bending further down, Shugo sunk deeper into Osamu’s body, emitting another tender smile, watching Osamu melt from his touch. Curling his toes, he flinched as Shugo’s thrusts became faster.

Grinning pleasurable, Shugo met his lips again, choking his moans with another passionate and deep kiss.

They moved together, matching each other’s pace, lost to the pleasure, rough and eager but just as affectionate.

“Shugo!” Osamu screamed, grabbing the sheets, clenching into the fabric, his legs pressing against his lover’s sides, encouraging him to move faster.

Shugo groaned strained, his free hand sliding up Osamu’s thighs, kneading the thewed skin under his fingers, rolling it, he let his hand wander over the expanse of Osamu’s body beneath him. Tracing the lines and curves of his muscles from his stomach to his chest and his neck before stopping. 

“Samu! ... I ...I want...” Shugo groaned to each of his thrusts, hesitating to move further when Osamu nodded his head, clutching his palm around Shugo’s wrist to guide it to his throat.

“Do it...touch me...please!”

Osamu wanted this so much. Feeling Shugo’s large hand hold on to his slender neck, tightening the grip in a way that the pain and the pleasure combined and made him tremble from its stimulation. Having the feeling intensify with a sensation burning as hot as fire uniting in his stomach, creeping from his head down to his cock, trapped between them, ready to burst any moment.

He wanted to cry out, but his voice failed him as Shugo held on to him.

Holding on to Osamu’s hips up, diving deep into his clenching tightness, the head of his cock pressing against his prostate, watching him quiver from the sudden impact, before another movement replaced it with denial, Shugo kept going.

Osamu's head felt light yet heavy and he pondered if this was what Shugo was feeling when he did it to him as the sense of release rippled a second time through his body.

Feeling Shugo’s touch clench around him harder before he let go, Osamu cried out his name.

“Shu!” Osamu breathed, kissing him again, moving his hand to squeeze his cock teasingly.

“I know...let’s come together.” He crooned, feeling Osamu’s insides clench tighter than usual around his throbbing cock.

Osamu arched his back, toes pushing into the sheets to meet Shugo’s thrusts as his arms clung on to him.

“Shugo... inside me...cum inside!”

Shugo's hand clasped around Osamu’s cock feeling him throb against his palm.

Gaze switching between Osamu’s expression varying in pleasure and the place of their connection making it impossible to hold back even a second longer.

“Samu! ...I am coming...I am-!”

Increasing the speed of his hips, his thrusts turning more erratic, more impatient, seeking a deeper need, as his breath turned into rapid pants echoing through the room and competing to the sounds from the streets, Shugo was overwhelmed by pleasure, quivering as he found release a second time.

“Osamu!” Shugo gasped, pulling him close, lifting him onto his lap, making sure his hands held on to his back before Shugo sat down on his heels.

His free hand slipping from his back up to his head, caressing his face while not letting go of his cock with the other, he continued to work his hand on him.

Shugo thrusted his hips forward one last time, shutting his eyes while frowning as his orgasm controlled his body, shuddering against his lover, their lips sealed into another kiss.

Feeling Shugo flooding his insides, Osamu held the kiss for a little while longer before pushing Shugo down on the bed, enjoying the view of watching Shugo cum as his warmth poured into him.

“Mhm...yes...Fuck, you are coming so much.” He rocked his hips, smiling in disbelieve at how full his stomach already felt.

Grasping Shugo’s chest, he rode out the waves of his orgasm as Shugo spilled inside him.

Tightening his grip on Osamu’s waist, pushing him down into his cock, straddling on him, Shugo let out a throaty moan as Osamu made his orgasm drag on, overstimulating his cock with his thrusts.

“Osamu stop ... ahh... I am still...ahhrghhh!” Meeting his eyes, Osamu snickered delighted, caressing Shugo’s wrist which had only temporary stopped moving on his cock to jerk him off as well.

The feeling of his cum gushing into him, its warm filling up his stomach, Osamu placed one hand back on it, pressing into it, muscles flexing as he did. Not once taking his eyes away from Shugo, he watched him, as Osamu found release as well.

“Shuhhhh...go...ahhh!“ Osamu moaned, shooting onto Shugo’s chest and lips as the thick ropes of white liquid shot in the air between them before splashing down on his body.

Exhausted, Osamu bend over him, licking the traces of his release away from Shugo’s lips before asking for another hungry kiss, not wanting to let go of Shugo inside him, he clenched at him before he fell onto the bed next to Shugo. Shugo’s cum almost immediately oozing out of him as soon as his cock slipped away, Osamu shivered to the sensation, curling up alongside his boyfriend, dragging him into an embrace.

* * *


	3. Epilogue

* * *

By the time Shugo woke up, he didn’t even remember when they ended up falling asleep after they had gone for another round, or had it been two more? Shugo wasn’t so sure anymore, but it was definitely draining enough for them to have passed out as they were after they had finished.

Feeling an already acquainted pain inside his stomach, Shugo wanted nothing more than to rush and take a shower to get rid of what was causing it and to wash himself up from the remnants of their activity.

Rolling to the side, wondering if Osamu was still sleeping, Shugo couldn’t help but smile as he saw him sleeping peacefully next to him, laying on his stomach, his neck and the marks he had left on him perfectly exposed to him to see.

Grabbing the blanket to adjust them on top of Osamu, he leaned in to place a faint kiss on Osamu’s neck as well as the marks on his nape, before slipping off the bed to stagger to their bathroom to take a shower.

After he took a shower, dried his hair and body and put on some fresh comfortable clothes, he walked to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for him and Osamu.

Shugo never really cooked for himself, but in the past couple of months after watching Osamu cook for him all the time, he wanted him to teach him a few things and although Shugo had been awful at first, he was a quick learner and eventually got a lot better, so much that he even grew some confidence in his cooking. Having advanced from only preparing rice and preparing egg rolls, he could now almost make a full Japanese style breakfast with miso soup and salmon and various side dishes as well as a selection of different western style breakfast meals.

Checking their fridge and aiming for something quick and simple, Shugo took out four eggs, some butter and cheese, he decided to make scrambled eggs with a grilled cheese sandwich. It wasn’t exactly healthy or extravagant, but after last night, something like this would be more than fine. At least the captain part inside Shugo thought so.

Getting everything ready while adding some vegetables like paprika and tomatoes, after he figured it turned out quite greasy after all, he kept it warm on low heat while preparing a green smoothie and coffee to drink along with it.

Making sure he didn’t forget anything, he laid out the kitchen table and prepared one more thing as he wouldn’t want to wait much longer for it, before he headed back to their bedroom to see if Osamu was already awake.

* * *

Osamu barely managed to open his eyes, yet alone move. His entire body burned, form his neck down to his hips and legs. Every fibre of it felt sore and exhausted desperate having slept almost until noon. Hardly able to move his limbs, Osamu touched the spot beside him on the bed only to notice that it was left empty and cold.

Assuming Shugo must have gotten up some time ago already. Not wanting to stay in bed alone, he attempted to sit up but pushed the idea away almost immediately as he felt his body cry out in pain. Rolling back to the side when just then Shugo came to look for him.

Laying on the bed, his body still sticky and sweaty from last night’s activities, his face reddened, remembering how much they did it last night as soon as he saw Shugo.

Thanks to Shugo, Osamu was able to find out that Shugo’s way of making love was not only thrilling but felt also so good. It was amazing, so amazing that it literally took Osamu’s breath away.

“Osamu, are you awake? I made breakfast.”

Shugo stated as he walked closer to the bed, looking already so handsome in his random pair of black pants and his plain greige shirt, Osamu couldn’t help but glare at him, sulkily making Shugo stop and raise his hands alert.

“What?” Shugo chuckled before concern spread across his face and he lowered his hands to walk close enough to caress Osamu’s face. “You don’t want to eat? Does your stomach hurt too? Want to shower?”

Still squinting at him, his eyes came to a rest when he saw the red marks on Shugo’s neck, realising he would look the same if not worse and that it meant for him to wear turtlenecks for the next couple of days to work, Osamu’s brows furrowed even more as he still welcomed the warmth of Shugo’s palms on face.

“Yes. No. Yes. Yes.”

Osamu answered, letting out a sigh after seeing Shugo’s confused expression.

“My reply to your questions. Yes, I am awake. No I do want to eat. Yes, my stomach does hurt but it’s okay, and another yes for the if I want to take a shower part but my entire body aches and I don’t want to walk so you need to carry me, please.” Osamu smiled cutely, rolling on his back to lift his arm to pull Shugo down into a kiss, welcoming the smell of food stuck to his clothes.

“And good morning...and thank you...you smell really tasty.”

Shugo could only laugh at that statement when he kissed him again, making it last before pulling away. 

“Good morning, babe.” Shugo hummed happy. “I am sorry, I’ll carry you to the bathroom. My hips aren’t in that much pain.”

Osamu just nodded his head, pulling Shugo down into a kiss when he felt his arms slip underneath his body to lift him up and carry him to the bathroom.

Once he was taking a shower and Shugo made sure Osamu was fine alone, he walked back into the kitchen giving his lover some privacy. 

While Osamu had set the priority to washing up rather than inspecting his body in the mirror, he had no idea what he looked like until he saw his reflection after having finished showering and being able to walk and stand by himself again.

His eyes wide in shock, he only now saw the crimson almost purple marks on his neck from where Shugo marked him. He assumed his marks would have been as bad as he saw them on Shugo but he had no idea they were as bad as this to this extent.

It was almost as if his entire neck was painted red and purple making it look even more scary with the amount of hickeys covering his chest and back.

But what made things more difficult for Osamu as Shugo was doing that to him yesterday, everything felt so good, he couldn’t even be mad at him now when was the one who had begged him for more.

Blushing furiously, Osamu hurried to dry himself before walking to their dressing room to pick the next best turtleneck and some pair of sweatpants, before taking a look into the mirror.

The hickeys and marks were completely hidden behind the fabric of his shirt and while this was what he intended with that outfit, he suddenly couldn’t help but wonder if this was what Shugo would have wanted to see.

Osamu too embarrassed or ashamed of the marks Shugo left on him after having asked for them the night before, all covered up, wanting to hide them away although it was just the two of them.

He shook his head as he rushed to take off the shirt he wore to pick a different and normal black shirt that exposed his throat naturally. Checking himself in the mirror one last time he headed to the kitchen to Shugo.

Hands pushed into the pockets of his pants, he joined Shugo next to the table as he just put down the plates with the food he made.

Turning to Osamu to kiss his temple his expression grew brighter as his eyes wandered down to Osamu’s neck, making Osamu blush noticing his reaction.

“What? Am I looking weird?” Osamu asked worried, already about to regret having not worn the turtleneck when Shugo shook his head. Putting down the tray on the table, he turned to Osamu to cup his face, moving his right hand down to lift up his chin to get a better view on his marks.

His voice was tender and soft.

“You didn't hide them.”

Shugo said, brown eyes sparkling as they met Osamu’s again. “I thought you would.”

Swallowing, Osamu put his palms on Shugo’s hands, snuggling against them, unable to hide his embarrassment, yet wanting to convey his feelings honestly.

“I wanted to at first...but then...I thought you would like to see them.”

Shugo’s chest tightened and before he could have replied with words, he had pulled Osamu into a kiss. Brushing back his hair while holding on to his head gently, Shugo got rid of their height difference by bending far enough down to kiss, making Osamu let out a soft throaty moan.

Interrupting their kiss but keeping his faces close, Shugo hummed, realising that he didn’t want to wait any longer.

“Osamu,” he breathed, “...I know this isn’t a fancy dinner or some luxurious place with a gorgeous view. This is just our home and I apologise that I didn’t even prepare you flowers or anything else you deserve, yet alone made a huge effort for this...” Shugo took a moment to sort his thoughts when he saw Osamu’s confused face, not sure what he was trying to say.

“Shugo, why would you need to prepare flowe-“

Pressing a finger on top of Osamu’s lips, Shugo made him stop before reaching for his hands to hold on to it, giving it a faint squeeze.

“I will do this the right way another time, I promise, but I think if I wait any longer I won’t be able to hide this from you, I am sorry.” Shugo sighed, shutting his eyes to take in a deep breath before going down on one knee in front of Osamu, lifting his face to meet Osamu’s eyes.

“Osamu...” Shugo began, feeling Osamu flinch, startled at what was Shugo about to do, he held on to his hand while he listened to his words.

“Osamu, I know this comes sudden and we never really talked about the future to this degree, but for some time now and considering everything that happened last night, I know for sure that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. As your friend, as your lover and - if you would give me the honour and say yes – as your husband as well. Osamu Miya, would you like to marry me?” Letting go of his hands, Shugo reached into the pocket of his pants to take out a small box, opening it for Osamu to see.

Caressed by black velvet was a slender golden ring with a tiny rectangular shaped white diamond in its middle, glistening and sparkling to the lights of the room.

Osamu didn’t expect anything like this and as much as it came as a shock, now that he saw the ring, and realised that Shugo was indeed proposing to him right now, all he could do was stare at the ring before turning back to Shugo, whose expression looked even more nervous than before any match.

The corners of his lips, twitching into a smile, Osamu didn’t need a moment to think, it was true that this came completely out of the blue, but he loved Shugo just as much, so why would he have to hesitate. Nodding his head he placed his hand over Shugo’s holding on to the box.

“Yes. Yes, I want to be your husband.” Osamu smiled, accepting his proposal. “But please...I don’t need anything else. I don’t need a fancy dinner or flowers or a great view. This is perfect as it is. It suits us.” He added.

His heart in is chest beating when he heard Osamu’s answer, Shugo took the ring, putting the box on the table to reach for Osamu’s left ring finger.

Gently and carefully putting the ring on until it hugged the base of his ringfinger, Shugo smiled proudly.

“It’s perfect.”

“It really is.” Osamu seconded.

Getting up from his knee to kiss Osamu, Shugo was just about to touch his lips, wanting to return their kiss, only to have Osamu’s stomach growl, interrupting them at the most inconvenient moment.

Chuckling, Shugo caressed Osamu’s face lovingly, placing another kiss on the bridge of his nose.

“Hungry?” He asked, seeing Osamu nod his head. “Yes...it....it smells too good.” He blushed shyly while letting out a frustrated sigh, frowning bothered. “I am sorry. I am so unromantic.”

Shugo chuckled even more, shaking his head.

“Don’t be sorry.” He said smooth. “I am happy to have my fiancé get hungry from smelling my cooking. I take that as a compliment.”

Hearing him use the word fiancé for the first time, Osamu couldn’t help but grin, stepping on his tiptoes to kiss Shugo once more.

“I love you so much. ”

Letting go of Osamu after stealing another kiss from him, Shugo held Osamu close, feeling as if the last weight was lifted off from his shoulders as he kept that ring hidden for quite some time already, never sure when the right time would be.

Full of love and flying on cloud nine, he shut his eyes.

“I love you too, but what am I supposed to do now?” Shugo asked sincere. “I don’t want you to starve since you are hungry, but I also don’t want to let go of you.” He sulked, when Osamu let out a soft sigh, kissing him again.

“I don’t want you to let go of me either.” He confessed, grabbing Shugo’s hand to guide him to the table making Shugo sit down first on the chair before Osamu took a seat on his lap.

Snuggling against him, he made Shugo wrap his hands back around his middle, smiling pleased.

“This way you can hug me, and I can eat.” He explained, when Shugo squeezed him tighter, arching forward to kiss his cheek, resting his head on Osamu’s shoulder watching him eat the breakfast he made.

“I told you that I love you, right?” Shugo asked, just to make sure again when Osamu chuckled, cheeks stuffed with the first bite of toast, looking far too adorable.

“You did...and I love you too.” Osamu murmured before Shugo let him eat his breakfast without further interruptions, simply enjoying the view of having him enjoy his meal.

The end

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this story, feel free to leave me kudos or a comment. Thank you so much in advance. 🤍
> 
> you can find me on twitter [@yv_nana](https://twitter.com/yv_nana) for updates or other information.


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